Friday 12 April 2013

Letting go a school day at a time

April 12, 2013

It's official. My daughter, my little baby girl, is now registered for Kindergarten. Yep, she starting in the fall, so I have that long to work on not balling my eyes out when I take her to class the first day. I waited in line in the cold to get her in the school I wanted. But when it was my turn to go into the office, I could feel my eyes welling up. I held it together, good thing too, because I didn't want my daughter's future principal to think I was a basket case and one of "those moms" right off the hop. I totally am, but it doesn't hurt to let the staff at my daughter's new school to get to know me first.

At first I really couldn't figure out where the tears and the lump in my throat were coming from at the thought of my little monkey starting Kindergarten. I mean, there's lots to choose from of course. The big one is that she is growing up. She's not my baby anymore. It makes me feel old, since I clearly remember the day I started Kindergarten myself. But I think the true reason for my mopey demeanour at the thought of her marching into school on her first day is that it is the first day of her letting go of me.

For five years I've been it in her life. I was the one who feed her, changed her, dressed her, played with her (okay well, the better half did too!) We were the most important people in her lives. And she always will be the most important person in our lives. And it's not that I think she's not going to love me one day after Kindergarten. I just feel like that's when she'll really grow up and time will march on even faster than it has these last five years. She'll make new friends, get busy doing new things and I'm excited for her about what the future holds. It's just the selfish me wiping those tears off my face, realising how quickly it will all go by and wanting to relish each moment.

Friday 5 April 2013

April 5, 2013

I think there should be a refresher school course for parents. My little monkey loves books. She's still working on the reading part, but I know she'll get it in the next year. The better half and I field endless requests for "can you read me a story?" We try to oblige as often as possible. After all, it was our doing. We taught her from a very early age to love reading and books. When she was only a few days old the better half started reading her the sports section out of the Brandon Sun. Both writers ourselves, we knew fostering the love of reading started early. Besides, it gave us another way to interact with her when she was an infant and babies really respond to your voice and the attention. Not all of her books have been that interesting. She loves Disney Princess books or any book about princesses or fairies. We've really covered that subject. And I found the ABC the counting to 100 books a little dull.

But now I'm quite delighted that know we've discovered "Fancy Nancy," books written by Jane O'Connor. O'Connor seems to have great insight to the person my little girl is. Fancy Nancy is a little girl, about 7 or 8 years-old that loves everything fancy. But what's really great about O'Connor's books is that the author is teaching her readers something as they are enjoying reading about Fancy Nancy's adventures. Fancy Nancy also likes to use big words, and this has increased my five year-old's vocabulary substantially since we got into these books. It's the adventures my monkey reads about in books, that makes me wish there was a brush up course on these subjects for parents. The latest Fancy Nancy is about a school trip to the planetarium and discusses Fancy's Nancy's love of stars.

So quite rightly, my daughter assumes I know everything and asks me to name some other constellations (her big word this week). "Um, I say, the little dipper, the big dipper, Gemini, Pegasus..." I was short by about 84 constellations. So if summer ever comes, I've promised to keep the monkey up past her bedtime and drive out to a dark field somewhere with the better half's telescope where we can gaze at all the stars. The one good thing about spring being so late this year is that I have time to brush up on my space knowledge so I can continue my daughter's illusion that her mother knows everything!

Saturday 23 March 2013

Let them throw it...

I've got you baby
By Kyla Henderson
For March 23, 2013
kyla@lilbitbaby.ca

Do you ever wonder if your kids are bipolar? One minute I have a sweet and helpful, darling little girl and then as soon as I ask her to clean her room, the ugly, screaming, scary monster comes out. It's hard sometimes to believe that I'm talking to the same person who was calm and happy a few seconds earlier, but now that I look upon her in amazement as she has thrown her head back, tears are streaming down her face which is contorted into an ugly snarl, she's beat red and screaming,"NO, NO, NO, I don't want to!" My question to her was, "Sweetie, can you go tidy your room for a little bit? How about just pick the things up of the floor and then we can do something fun." Sounds reasonable to me, but perhaps my delivery was off, because in a split second she was in full-blown tantrum mode.

I am used to tantrums. I have been a parent of a very spirited girl for five years now and yep, I am used to them. In fact I usually go about my business and let her have her little fit. I make sure she's not going to hurt herself of course, but I'll go make coffee, or load the dishwasher and "ignore" her until she is done. I've really found of all the advice I've gotten since becoming a parent, that is one of the most useful pieces of advice. Now that she's older she doesn't usually throw herself on the floor for her fit, but will stomp her feet, scream, cry and sometimes will stomp down the hall to her room and slam her door. I don't enjoy her slamming her door. It makes the house seem to shake when she does it, but looking on the bright side, at least she went to hear room without me having to ask! I have to admit though, I was a bit stumped when she threw this tantrum. When she was younger tantrums came because she was hungry or tired or both. Now, in true girl fashion, it's mood related. "Why are you so upset? It will only take you a little while to pick up your room. Then we can do something fun. In fact I'm going to do the dishes when you do that. See, I'm doing a chore too. And I'm not sad about it. Sometimes we just need to do some chores before we have fun."

I don't why I try to reason. It is completely pointless effort on my part, but I'm always hopeful that one day my calm and soothing voice will get through her fit throwing. But she's stubborn, and unfortunately for her, so am I. So she screams and I let her, and then she cleans her room. It's not the nicest way to go about things, I suppose, but it works for us!

Thursday 14 March 2013

The Big Bowl touchdown

March 14, 2013

If there's one thing you never thought would be a popular topic before you had a child it's this: poop. Yep, since the monkey was born, the better half and I have had an endless number of conversations about our little girl's poop. At first it was about newborn poop - you know what it was supposed to look like that first poop, how it was supposed to look, when it would happen and then once it happened how gross it was and how we were glad it was over. And then over dinner even we started talking about our newborn's frequency of poop and the consistency. I learned that this is a common subject for all new parents. This continued on to potty training where we then not only talked to each other about No. 2, or as the better half likes to say, "Dropping the Browns at the Superbowl," we also talked to the monkey. Poop took a long time to come to the potty and when it did we practically threw a party. It was a very, very exciting event in our house, the poop in the potty, and we told everyone we knew about it.
I would even discuss poop with my baby store customers and still do in fact - only about their kids' poop and how it would relate to my kid's poop, in regards to potty training. You know "My kid hides in the corner when they are going to poop instead of going on the potty," etc.
So the monkey finally was potty trained a week before her third birthday, many of you may remember my "hallelujah" column where I celebrated the peeing and pooping in the potty with all of my readers. Since then, she goes potty and we don't really talk to much about it any more. I have to say, I am glad that we have once again moved on to more intelligible subjects of conversation, but once in a while it still does pop-up. Like when the monkey and I were in a public bathroom over the weekend. I was holding the door for her, (she very independent now you know, doesn't want me to go in, just hold the door,) and I hear a sigh. "What's the matter sweetie?," I ask. She had informed me in the food court she had to "take a big poop," rather loudly a few minutes earlier.
Again, rather loudly, "My poop is not coming out Mommy!" I hear someone cough uncomfortably in the next stall. "Well," I say. "Just relax and give it a few minutes."
"Okay," she says. Then another sigh. "Wait, Mommy! Here it comes!"
Another couple of people come into the bathroom.
"Oh wait, I think my poop is paused."
"Um," I say, glancing at the lady washing her hands. She smiles at me. I turn a bit red.
"Oh never mind," she calls. "It's coming, coming, coming! There it's in the water now! No I'm wiping! Just a little more wiping needed Mommy! Wiping, wiping, wiping!"
I felt like I was listening to a play-by-play of some sporting event.
Needless to say I was glad when she was done and out of that bathroom! Now enough potty talk!

Wednesday 6 March 2013

My little health nut

March 6, 2013

I've said this before and I will probably say it again. I am amazed at how much children absorb. And yes, I'm thinking of the Scottie's paper towel commercial where those guys dressed up in puffy white suits start jumping on spills. That's my kiddo. This morning she regaled me on the walk to preschool with a full 10 minute T.V. show, complete with two commercial breaks. The topic? How to be healthy. She divided it into three segments, first chatting about the eating healthy, then a mattress commercial, (she did all the voices) then she covered healthy drinks choices (milk and water the best and sugary choices like soda pop and another mattress commercial, and finally she talked about the benefits of exercising and used many examples about how she practises being healthy.

To say I was a bit wowed would be an understatement. It's not like the better half and I are health nuts. Sometimes we're wanna-be health nuts, but we usually undermine that with a trip to McDonald's. Or three trips to McDonald's. As parents though, we've always been trying to do our best when it comes to our daughter. We have gently taught her that healthy snacks like fruit and veggies and cheese are a better choice than candy. She drinks mostly water and milk because she think it will make her feel happy and well. And even more amazing to me as she knows when we're "treating" ourselves a bit too much. She'll call us on that second trip eating out in a week or suggest that we get apple slices and salad instead of fries this time. "Or maybe Mommy," she'll say. "Can we have some fruit with yogurt for dessert? I already had some cookies today."

In the morning if she's ever asked why I'm doing this exercise or that one, I'll tell her to get stronger, or feel better, or get faster so I can keep up with her. Perhaps we're a little too honest when we say we want to get healthier so we can live longer and spend more time with her and do all the things she can do. But at the same time, we are very careful with what we tell her.

I think I would be more alarmed if I was teaching her something else, perhaps if I uttered "I'm fat," or "I don't like my body," etc. around her that's the message that she would absorb. I'm glad we talk about being healthy. I'm hoping it's a message that she keeps throughout her life and continues to feel good about who she is.

Tuesday 5 March 2013

Welcome to the I've got you Babe blog!!

March 5, 2013

First I want to say thanks so much for following me through my column in the Brandon Sun's Community news for the last three years! Unfortunately for me the Brandon Sun is introducing some exciting new columns and "I've got you Babe," was on the chopping block. Keep a look out though for some great new material in the Community News!! You can check out the Community News for free through the Brandon Sun's website at brandonsun.com (scroll down to the bottom of the page.)

It's not the first job I've lost as a freelance writer, in fact, it's pretty inevitable, but I have to say I was enormously sad to not have the venue to write about my trails and tribulations raising my daughter every week. So here I am at ivegotyoubaby.blogspot.com writing my first blog! (When you're searching, look for i've got you baby at blog spot!) I will still pen a once weekly blog about what's going on in my world of parenting, appearing every Wednesday. The exciting new thing about writing this blog as I can post pictures and include some of your feedback. Of course I get the pleasure of writing about my child every week, but it's my goal to relate to my readers and engage them with my personal experiences of being a mom.

It's the hardest, most wonderful experience raising a child. I look forward to being a part of your reading every week and I would love to hear your feedback!!

You can post comments in the blog or email me at kyla@lilbitbaby.ca.